Whew........

My world has been so busy the past few weeks. I am sure that most of us can relate to the fact that life is busy. It seems like I would get up, go to work, work hard and fast all day, run errands after work, meetings in the evenings, come home, see Steve for about 10 minutes and then go to bed. On days that I did not go to work, I had plenty of things to work on at home, ie laundry, ironing, some cooking, office work, errands that needed to be done, etc.

I have been placed in a challenging situation at work this school year and instead of relying on Him to help me through it, I have been trying to come up with my own solutions of how things should be done. I had wanted to show them that I could rise to this challenge and be super woman and have time to see approximately 45 children two times per week , have assessment time, paperwork time, planning time and meeting times for all of them in three days per week. I have come to the conclusion that this cannot be done!!!!

I had to do something last week that is very hard for all of us to do and that is to admit defeat!! I had to go into my boss and tell her that I could not do everything that needed to be done in the three days I worked. I told her I needed help (that is such a hard thing to admit). She understood my dilemma and said that she would try to get some help for me. I soon found out that the extra help I so badly needed was not to be and I was told to do the best I could.

At first I was mad, then upset and saying to myself that it isn't fair that they should expect me to do a full time job on a part time schedule and on and on. Finally, in desperation I cried out to the One who knew my dilemma and despair. Why I waited so long I don't know but He began to bring peace to my soul about the situation and helped show me the error of my ways. I was whining and complaining to everyone, and the whole situation consumed me. I had become negative and disheartened.

I was having my quiet time one morning and reading a devotional that was meant just for me at that moment. It was talking about whatever situation you may be in not to lose your joy and to praise Him no matter what. I was so humbled as I read this because it was all playing back in my mind just how negative I had been, how much I had complained and on and on. As I began to seek His forgiveness, I began to realize that it had been all about me. He showed me that no matter what He is in control and has a plan a purpose for me. I began to realize that He had moved me to be in this new school for a reason, He knew the road would be hard, He knew the circumstances that I would be in and He knew that I would wake up to theses truths. I read this morning that as I enter His throne room with my cares and burdens loaded into a dump truck; that I should dump them out before Him and leave with a song and dance of praise. I have unloaded all my cares on Him and now I am singing and dancing His praises!!!!

I know that the tasks will be difficult as I continue this path during this school year. I know that discouragement and discontentment are always lurking around the corner. But!!! I know that I am not in this alone. I know that He will light my path and give me what I need to face each day. I know that I am there to love on these children and to help them to the best of my ability and with Him I will!!! I may not get things done as quickly as I would like, I may not know where I will place the new children that will be entrusted to me but I do know that I will keep on plodding down the road just like a turtle, (slow and steady wins the race!!), and get things done as quickly as I can, even though it may be slower than I would like.

At the end of the school year I will be able to look back at all the things that have been accomplished and the lessons learned both in the world and spiritually as well and give a big sigh of relief!!!!

Whew!!!!!!! We made it!!